Not sorry. I told everyone I am expert in my experience. Well....I'm an expert in what my experiences are, just not how they effected me or those around me. I've been writing about church a lot. That shouldn't surprise anyone, most of my life was involved in a church of some sort. It was an integral part of me. Was. So that's why I write about it. Church has been a major player in destroying a person close to me and several families very close to me. So yeah...I've got a bit of a beef. And they aren't the only ones either.
That being said. Like I mentioned yesterday, church can be a pleasant and uplifting experience for a lot of people as well. I know that the church I grew up in, is nothing at all like the church it is now. It is so much better. There have been leadership changes, a change in name, changes in theology, a willingness to listen to much of the pushback I and many others have, and actually do something about it. I think that's why it's hard to write some of the things I do. Are they perfect? Far from it. Do they meet all of everyones needs? Nope. Do I expect them to? Nope. Do they try? I believe they do. I've had many conversations with those in leadership of that church and believe in them.
(pre-following script, I was going to try to be less heavy today...but that didn't happen)
To change gears a bit for this morning....
Nothing in nature is stagnant. It is all in a process of living, dying or changing. I added changing because of things like rocks and water. Rocks erode but never fully die. Water evaporates and then it rains. We are no different. We are either living or dying. And in the process we change. I don't think we think about death enough. It's something every one of us is going to face, whether it's ourselves or someone close to us and no one knows when. Death is real. And it doesn't always happen when we are old. Sometimes it happens when we are young. Sometimes it happens before we've had a chance to even take a breath for ourselves. I hurt when I hear of miscarriages. Families are looking forward to inviting this little human into their lives only to have it pass away way to soon. It's not fair. It hurts. It's not easy. In moments like that, feel free to cope just about any damn way you please. And don't let anyone tell you how you should feel. You feel how you feel. For a time. I wish I could give you some wisdom on how to move forward from the loss of a loved one, but I really can't. When people close to me die, I don't feel much of anything. My wife and my kids are the only ones I get shaken up by at the thought of losing them. Sorry for those of you that didn't make the cut. I'm working on how to feel emotions again. It doesn't mean I don't care about you. If anything, I care more about the people left behind.
I'm probably the worst guy to talk to about death. Seriously. Or maybe the best. I have no idea.
Life. I also am probably with worst guy to talk to about life. Or maybe the best. I have no idea.
As you go about your day, be aware. Don't worry about death. Worry about life. Just kidding. Don't worry about life. LIVE your life. Except death as a reality. And treat everyone you love as though they could die any time. That doesn't mean you have to be all huggy all the time. But maintain a relationships that if at any time someone passed, you'd know that you'd loved and lived well. It's always said that funerals are a celebration of life! Why wait?
I am aware that I kind of contradicted myself. It happens. Feel free to share your experiences though. I think they'd be helpful for all. I know I'd like to hear them. In life or death, you are not alone.
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